What Happened and What I Learned

I am going to try something new this post. I think it should have a good flow. It probably won’t be as substantial as something I would normally post. We will chalk it up to laziness. The format will be in a “What Happened” and “What I Learned” format. See if you can follow.

I had a cookout last Friday. I learned that pork tenderloins grilled up in barbecue sauce are as good or better than barbecue chicken. I also learned that I couldn’t duplicate Paul Griffith’s barbecue burgers if I had to. Cookouts without Unit 899 aren’t as much fun as cookouts with Unit 899, but Jason Will almost makes it that good. On his way over, Jason asked if anyone was playing cornhole. I told him no, but we would play when he got there. He said, “I can beat anyone there and if I can’t beat 'em, I’ll trash talk 'em ‘til I can!” He said it. Believe it. Also, I like it when people leave before 1 a.m. Beth does, too.

Saturday morning, Beth and I took Flat Stanley around Lexington to take pictures of him in cool locations for our niece, Emma. I learned the wind always blows when you wish it wouldn’t. Each picture we tried to take, ten minutes were wasted because we never could get Stanley to stand up due to the wind. So, most of the pictures ended up with one of us holding Flat Stanley. I also learned there are some really photo-esque places in Lexington. If you want to see some of them, I can take you on a walking tour of downtown sometime. I learned of a singer worse than Sanjaya, just kidding, that was singing the national anthem before Transy’s women’s college softball game last weekend. We were walking around Transy’s campus and heard something sounding like Wing off of Southpark. It really hurt.

I went to Wes Graham’s wedding on Saturday. I learned that going to weddings are really fun until you get married. For every wedding you attend after your own, you are inclined to compare and contrast the wedding your at with your own until you just want to leave. Either you say, “Man this is an awesome wedding.” Or you say, “This sucks, I’m out.” Our wedding was the gold standard in my books. I think (hope) everyone feels that way about his or her wedding. Also, I learned the wind never blows in Lexington when you wish it would. Wearing a suit in the sun is not cool (no pun intended).

Brandon Pigg and I went to Keeneland on Sunday afternoon. I learned that if it has recently rained, don’t walk through the barns to get to the track. There are mud holes everywhere. I also learned that if it has not rained recently; don’t walk through the barns to get to the track. It will be dry and very dusty. Your shoes will be covered in dust. Remember where horses poo? Yeah, horses poo on the ground. The poo dries up and breaks down to dust size particles. Then, it gets blown by the wind into your hair, on your clothes, and if you aren’t lucky in your mouth. Sick, huh? Yeah, I won some loot. Not a "We're-all- going-to-Malone's-and-I-am-buying-type winner. I just left with more scratch in my wallet than I came with.

I posted an entry on my blog today. I learned that if you are too lazy to make an entry or feel like it has been too long since your last post, you shouldn’t force it. Otherwise, you end up with something crappy like you have just read.

But JD, what about the Kentucky Derby? You haven’t given us any of your picks, yet.

I swear to Chuck Norris, do you have to sound so whiney? Hold your horses (Ha! Ha!) and I’ll let you know. This year I am going to change my strategy and go with a large exacta wheel. Exacta, you remember, betting the horses that finish first and second in order. Glad you remembered. This week my strategy looks like this:

$5 Exacta Wheel
Street Sense, Scat Daddy, Curlin
over
Street Sense, Scat Daddy, Any Given Saturday, Curlin, and Hard Spun
For a total of $60.

$10 Across on Curlin for a total of $30.

This will be for a grand total of $90. Not set in stone, hopefully, I will be able give you a more solidified pick next week once the post draw is finished. Plus, I still haven't figured out Circular Quay.

If you try to get up with me this weekend, I will be in West Virginia for Emma and Erin’s (Chris’s wife—Beth’s brother for those unfamiliar) birthdays. Catch you on the flip.

Playing Catch-Up

For the dedicated readers, I apologize for not touching base with you sooner. I have been really busy over the past couple of weeks. So much has been going on and there have been items I have really wanted to get your feelings on. I’ll start off with our trip last Friday to Keeneland.

There were several people there with us, most of them from work. Beth and I had a really great time despite the snow. We set up camp in the second level sports bar so we could stay out of the snow. Snow? Yes, a white out hit the track around the seventh race. It was snowing so hard when we were walking back to the car that I had to put on my sunglasses just to keep the snow out of my eyes. What about the handicapping? I did pretty well considering. I went with $130 and left with $124. I bet 7 out of the 10 races on the card and, well…let’s just say the bartenders weren’t asking for my ID by the time I left. I hit a couple of tickets that paid $50 or better. Not a bad day all in all.

The 2003 Kentucky Derby winner, Funny Cide, was running in the feature race, The Transylvania Stakes. My better(or) instincts told me to leave the horse out of my trifecta. Really, the horse hasn’t done much outside of his four year old campaign. As I was in line to bet it, there were some people in front of me discussing the same predicament I had playing out in my head.

“He’s trash! He hasn’t done squat in two years!”
“He was the Derby winner.”
“That was four years ago!”
“True. But, I am going to bet him for old time’s sake.”

Dumbass. That’s what I felt like saying. But, call it nostalgia, beer talking, or stupid man walking, for “old time’s sake,” I threw Funny Cide in the bottom of my trifecta wheel. Burn central. I think Funny Cide is still trying to get to the finish line. If I had kept the other horse in my wheel that I kicked out to put in Funny Cide, I would have hit the trifecta. Thank goodness I backed my bet up with a $10 across the board ticket on the winner Marcavelly that rolled in at 7-2. Not a long-shot, but he wasn’t the favorite, either.

I spoke too soon about the Bluegrass Stakes turning into a great race this weekend. The race has practically fallen apart. My favorite to win the race, Hard Spun, and my favorite for the Derby, Any Given Saturday, have defected. Hard Spun will train up to the Derby and AGS ran last weekend and was embarrassed in the Wood Memorial by a Barclay Tagg horse, Nobiz Like Shobiz. I guess Street Sense will romp the Bluegrass field, unless there is one horse...Love Dubai is all I can say. What about Giacomo’s half brother Tiago winning the Santa Anita Derby? Please, no more Giacomo’s!

Billy Gillispie as UK’s head coach? I smelled a senses of desperation and haste in this decision. I think there could have been a better coach selected for one of the highest offices in the basketball land. I assume that the administration wanted a head coach in place by the national signing day to lure in potential recruits and Gillispie is what they selected. He is still unproven in my books--another Tubby Smith, if you will. However, it may have paid off with the one of Gillispie’s recruits that had signed with Texas A&M, a big man named DeAndre Jordan. Word abuzz here in Lex is that he has already worked out with some of UK’s players. Good luck Gillispie! I hope you do well with UK, just no post game celebrating with your driving record.

What about the one that might get away? Mr. Kentucky Basketball, Steffphon Pettigrew from E-Town, has expressed interest in UK and said he would sign if UK came to him with a scholarship. Pettigrew is a 6-5 forward who averaged 33.9 points and 13.3 rebounds a game for E-Town. Tubby Smith told him he could walk on at UK, but offered no scholarship. (Lofton…what?) Billy Gillispie said he wanted to recruit the state’s best players. Can you tell a difference already? Maybe, Pettigrew will see some Wildcat Blue after all.

What about this Don Imus situation? What was that guy thinking? I hope he will eventually learn to just shut up. I know he has to fell really bad bout what he said. I think his main problem came when he went on Al Sharpton’s show. It was definitely not a great calculated risk on his part. I would have apologized to the Rutgers’ women’s basketball team and left it at that. No. He felt the need to apologize to the world and try to voice his actions to the deaf and obstinate. Idiot. I hate to say this, but Ann Coulter nailed this one.

I hope you guys had a great Easter. Due to circumstances, we stayed around Lexington. Go watch 300. It won’t win any Oscars, but I guarantee you will be entertained. I am leaving you with a list. I think you will find it quite interesting. I have put together an “Island Pond’s All-Time Greatest Country Music Hits”. I know there may be a few that should have been included on this two-disc set that aren’t there. Let me know what they are and we will include them on the third volume. Holla.

Volume I
1. Lucky Man--Montgomery Gentry
2. Had Your Leaving Coming--Vern Gosdin
3. I'm Gonna Miss Her--Brad Paisley
4. Lord, I Hope This Day is Good--Don Williams
5. I Miss A Lot Of Trains--Tom T. Hall
6. Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain--Willie Nelson
7. I Never Go Around Mirrors--Keith Whitley
8. Wasted Days and Wasted Nights--Freddy Fender
9. What I'd Say--Earl Thomas Conley
10. I Tell It Like It Used To Be--T. Graham Brown
11. The Old, Old House--IIIrd Tyme Out
12. Country Bumpkin--Cal Smith
13. If Drinking Don't Kill Me--George Jones
14. Old Dogs, Children, and Watermelon Wine--Tom T. Hall
15. Pancho And Lefty--Merle Haggard and Willie Nelson

Volume II
1. Too Cold At Home--Mark Chesnutt
2. That's How I Got To Memphis--Tom T. Hall
3. I Can't Win For Losing You--Earl Thomas Conley
4. Sad Songs And Waltzes--Keith Whitley
5. Good Old Boys Like Me--Don Williams
6. Before the Next Teardrop Falls--Freddy Fender
7. Somewhere Between--Keith Whitley
8. I Wouldn't Want To Live If You Didn't Love Me--Don Williams
9. Just One More--George Jones
10. I'd Be Better Off In A Pinebox--Doug Stone
11. Dragging Shackles--Gary Stewart
12. Yesterday's Wine--Merle Haggard/George Jones
13. He Was a Friend of Mine--Willie Neslon
14. Drop Kick Me, Jesus--Bobby Bare
15. Songs About Rain--Gary Allen