Updizzle Fo Da Pizzle

(Update for the People)

For those who have been uninformed, Beth’s back surgery went fine and she is recovering nicely. For the next six weeks I have assumed the roll of Beth Attendant Number One. She is not allowed to bend, twist, or lift anything over 5 pounds per orders from the doc. I will be the medium for all her motor activities that are not approved. This seems to be all too convenient for the Christmas shopping season.

Sunday, I spent 5 ½ hours at Fayette Mall, and for those of you who know me, you know that is about 4 ½ hours too much. I had to be the pack mule for Mule Train Conductor Rhodes. We arrived at the mall a little after 9 a.m. and didn’t leave until 2:30 p.m. I had to make three trips back to the car to drop off bags during the spree. Thankfully, this covered about 90% of the Christmas shopping we had to do. It is a good thing that I will be off work on Thursday and Friday because there are a lot of presents to be wrapped.

Ellen Griswold: “What’s wrong, Honey? Clark, what is it?”

Clark W. Griswold: “It's a one year membership in the Jelly of the Month Club.”

Cousin Eddie: “Clark, that's the gift that keeps on giving the whole year.”

UK beat UofL this weekend in hoops in a really ugly game. Not much hope in that ever being on the football field. Tubby said of the win, “Despite what Paigey Poo says, a win is a win.” And more importantly, JDeezy says it is a LOSS for Loserville. So Cards fans, how is your football school doing? It’s too bad you have given up on basketball. UofL’s nice recruiting class that was so highly touted over UK’s freshman class shot the lights out at Freedom Hall with an ever impressive 3 of 19 shooting. UK's relatively untouted freshmen class was 10 for 16. I read the nice apology by UofL’s AD Jurich. You can check that story out here. Tell me, “What was that guy thinking?”

Beth and I had been mulling over when we were going to purchase a new TV. We had picked one out for the downstairs and one for the upstairs in the game room. I read yesterday at work the smaller of the two TV’s we were going to buy was on sale at Circuit City. Sold. I rolled over there yesterday and picked up a 32” Olevia LCD-HD. It took me forever to reconfigure the entertainment center up stairs so I could hook up the TV. I had my XBox, Game Cube, DVD player, and cable box hooked up through a Terk Pi, 4-input, RF Modulator. The cable box and RF Modulator sat on top of the old TV. They wouldn’t be able to sit on the new flat screen, so they had to go up a shelf. If only I had known what I was getting myself into.

It took me almost two hours to get all the cords lined out. Once I actually went to set to the TV in the entertainment center, I realized it was going to be a very close fit. Try about a quarter of an inch on each side. I had to rub down the sides of the TV with Vaseline to get it to wedge in. Once I got it in, I fired it up. Money. I cranked up the XBox with a little Star Wars: Battlefront II. I would have bought a new TV sooner if I knew how much better it was going to look. Joel, I can only imagine how good the XBox 360 is going to look on the screen in HD. Get ready for some Gears of War!

This will be the last post of the ‘Pond News until after the New Year. Please, travel safely this week. I hope you all have the holidays for which you are hoping. And let us not forget the Reason. See you in ’07.

There and Back

I made it back to The States alive, with no virus or flu-like symptoms. The cruise was good times, but it was not exactly as fun as what I experienced on my first cruise. I guess the first cruise sort of set the standard for the rest of all cruises. I am not saying that I did not enjoy myself. I think Beth has as couple of pictures of me that show I am enjoying myself, maybe, too much. The ship (Jewel of the Seas) was a relatively new boat, as it was built in 2004. The décor was not suitable for Disco Stu, so I was happy. It actually looked pretty swank. Casino, what?!?!?

We left Ft. Lauderdale on Sunday afternoon. Our first destination was Key West. The scene was tropic and the weather was excellent. We walked around the town for a couple of hours and shopped for souvenirs. After a couple of hours of this, we ended up at Sloppy Joe’s Bar on Duval. Duval Street is where it all goes down. I had a couple of Yeunglings and some crazy nachos that had Sloppy Joe stuff (a.k.a. Manwich) on it. I had to ask the bartender, who had been there for a couple of years, if the Real World Key West cast ever came in there. She said a couple of times, but the manager wouldn’t let the underage cast members drink so they didn’t stay long. I had to ask, sorry. The strange surprise on the island is the population of wild chickens that are everywhere. They walk down the sidewalk with you. They roost beside the fire hydrants. They hang out with the stray cats in the alleys. Chickens.

The next destination was Cozumel. Put Tiajuana on an island and there you go. Beth and I had been here before so we decided to just roll off the ship and eat a late lunch at Pancho’s Backyard. We had eaten at Pancho’s other restaurant on the other end of Cozumel and we really dug their queso con salsa verde (cheese and green salsa dip for the Non-Spanish speaking followers) and their not-from-a-mix margaritas. We figured it was worth another shot. The grub was good, but the margaritas (or I should say the lime flavored tequila shots) were harsh and too grande for me to drink two of them. However, I knocked down two fishbowls and a Tecate and a Sol. Hey, I was just trying to help out the local economy. This lead to an ill-advised purchase at a jewelry shop. For details, ask Beth.

***RANT ALERT***

If you have ever been to Mexico, I am sure you have encountered the pushy street vendors. I, personally, have decided not to return to Mexico due to the irritation these people provide. The country of Mexico has a great natural resource in the beauty of their land and their native traditions. Why does it have to be ruined by their attitudes and sales tactics towards tourists? Honestly, I would be more inclined to purchase products peddled by the vendors if they didn’t run at me, grab my arm, or yell at me. I am not sure who advised them on their sales procedure. Maybe, it was used car salesmen. Ba-Dum, Chhhh!

Costa Maya was the third destination. It was a Lee City-sized Cozumel with a pier. So, see above.

The last port of call was Georgetown, Grand Cayman. Beth and I had been here before. We walked around the town and shopped. The people there were really nice. A Margaritaville had recently opened. Joel, holla, if ya hear me! We had a couple of cheeseburgers in paradise and rolled back to the boat.

After a day at sea, we sailed back into Ft. Lauderdale on Saturday morning. We changed a couple of flights to get back to Lexington earlier. While in Atlanta waiting for our flight (delayed flight, of course), I ran into a old college buddy’s mother, who happened to be sharing our flight back to Lexington. It was none other than the mother of one-half of NWA:TNA’s The Franchised Naturals, Andy “The Wild Child” Douglas. It was really great to catch up with her. I probably hadn’t seen her since I was in school at Morehead. Small world, indeed.

I heard Ampletime was back on stage this past weekend at Avio in Lexington, I couldn’t find anyone to go with me, so I sat this one out. I’ll catch them next time, hopefully.

Florida or Michigan? Hasn’t that been the question for a week? I would say Michigan and you know I am not a Michigan homer. They played number one, OSU, to a three-point game at OSU two weeks ago. And that alone, tells me they are at least number two. If the game was played at a neutral site or even at Ann Arbor, who knows what would have happened? But, in reconsideration, what would happen if there would have been a rematch and Michigan won? Two number ones? What if Florida beats OSU and Michigan destroys USC in the Rose Bowl? I am not saying that it will happen nor will I predict the remote chances of it happening. But, what if?