The Anti-Fan, Fan

Have you ever had conversation about a sports team with someone who claims they are one of the biggest fans? Yet, this person can't say anything good about the team or the game in question. I am speaking of the same kind of "fan" that always compares the current team to the teams of the past--where the team is never as good as they once were. Well....

I had one of those conversations the other day. No matter what good point about the team I brought up, the response was always negative. (Not that all his points were invalid. Some were very true). Dude said he knew the team in question(Pittsburgh Steelers) was going to suffer a defeat as early as the second quarter. At that point and time until halfway through the third quarter, the Steelers were ahead 10-7. This person went on to say the boneheaded play by Antwaan Randle El (http://msn.foxsports.com/nfl/recap?gameId=20050925023), didn't bother him. The play was an improv hook and ladder after Randle El had already gained forty yards from a reception and muffed the lateral to a caught-off-guard Hines Ward, who was getting ready to throw a block. The result was a Pittsburgh fumble. It didn't lead to a New England score, but the Steelers would have been on their own 15 yard line. This was probably the worst play of the game and season, so far. Super Fan was also upset that Big Ben didn't appear as if he came to play. Ask any NFL quarterback, whose O-Line crumbles constantly (i.e. Chad Pennington, J.P. Losman, Kurt Warner), how hard it is to look like you came get the job done. I am sure they will tell you it's REAL hard.

Later on, I asked this #1 Steelers fan what he thought about the extra 52 seconds on the game clock in the fourth quarter. In essence, the game would have been decided in overtime. Adam Vinateri's last field goal with one tick left would have been for nada. He said the Steelers didn't deserve to win because of the way they played the entire game. I don't know about you, but I always thought whoever was in the lead at the end of the game(or overtime) usually won. To end the conversation, he stated he was not a pessimistic fan. I had to stop listening at that point. I couldn't respond without playing him back everything he had just said, but (Dang me!) I had left my tape recorder at home.

Later on that day, another fan of the Steelers spoke of his conversation with the same dude. He said the whole time they were discussing the game, he felt like he had to defend the same team this Supa Dupa Fan was busting on. The defender of the Steelers also said an extreme Bengals fan he talked to about the game wasn't even that harsh. I say, you need to check and see if you are still wearing the black and gold and calling Heinz Field home. Otherwise, throw in your Terrible Towel.

Sorry for the rant. Please give me some insight, if possible.

It's Getting Closer

Friday has finally arrived. The thing each and every one of us has been working toward all week, just like every week before, has come. Don't blink because when you open your eyes it will be Monday. Beth and I are traveling to West Virginia this weekend to visit her parents, but not until Saturday morning. So, I have one evening to relax with my friends and maybe throw some darts, cornhole, etc....

The wedding day is getting closer, perhaps more quickly than I expected. This means the trip to Beth's parents is not without task. We are taking our wedding invitations to her parents for them to address and mail. Thank goodness for computers and printers with fancy calligraphy fonts. This is going to save them tons of time. Other than that, we will be playing with Emma and watching Jimmy Neutron. I may take my Cornish-hole boards for some evening entertainment. Starting the 8th of October is weekend after weekend after weekend of wedding showers for Beth. Man, it's really getting close.

Also coming at us at a deafening pace is the opening of the Keeneland fall meet, where I turn into the mad handicapper. I really am looking forward to being back at the track this fall. The sights, sounds and smells are intoxicating. There is a strong aroma of popcorn doused by cigar smoke and a mild tinge of horse manure in the crisp fall air. The waves of steam coming from your piping hot bowl of burgoo dance like two colts playing in the shedrow. The beautiful architecture of the facilities mixed in with the amber and auburn hues of the turning leaves on the trees spin you into a euphoric dream state where you imagine yourself saddling up your best filly for the Queen Elizabeth II Challenge Cup.

You hear yourself telling your jock to get her to the rail quick and keep her just off pace, as the crowd gawks at your machine from the paddock. A dull roar from the crowd conversation makes you feel like you have to yell at your rider just so he will hear you. While you help the jockey mount the impressario, you tell him to never mind the Bob Baffert rabbit thrown in the race to chase the Christophe Clement pace demon so he won't get caught up in the quick steps of the speed horses. This because, you know the D. Wayne Lukas horse is the real threat. Another 3-1 off pace son of a gun, just like yourself. You feel good about the race as you review your last workout, a bullet, 0:59 and change, five furlong work over a firm turf course, just five days ago. Nothing else compares and your girl is ready. Mike Battaglia's morning line odds had her at 10-1, the fans have her now at 3-1. She is still a bargain. The call to the post echoes in your ears. It's time to go to work. You watch your beauty walk towards the track entrance tunnel--the same tunnel walked by legends such as Syndicate, Cherokee Run, Louis Quatorze, Take Charge Lady, Go For Wand, Whirlaway, Azeri, Northern Dancer, Riva Ridge, and Alydar. You yell to the jock, "Get up on the reins and show 'em how to ride!" Time to go to the owner's box and calm them down before the race. And don't forget to calm yourself down.

"The horse have reached the starting gate for Keeneland's ninth and feature race of the day, the Queen Elizabeth II Challenge Cup. This will be a 1 and an 1/8th mile race on turf for three year old fillies on the Haggin Course. The turf is rated at firm. Please note on the totalisator, the jockey on the three horse is 2 pounds over and the six horse has added blinkers. We have a full field of twelve horses today and it looks like they are ready to go."

Minute seem to stretch into hours as you wait for the horses to be pushed into the gate. The eight horse seems to need encouragement to enter the hole, just adding everlasting seconds to your agony. Finally, the eight horse and the rest slide in with ease.

"They're at the post........"

".....And they're off!"

Somehow, I just fired myself up for horse racing. I really can't wait for it, now. I guess I'll just have to go play some Derby Owners Club this evening at Buffalo Wild Wings. Yeah, you're right. I was planning on that already!

Chase/Alisha,
ARRRRRGGHHH, me mateys! I'll not be a furgetten ye talk like eh pirate dey!!!!

"Paul Harvey here, G-Day!"

Jon, Joel's Calling. Are You Gonna Answer?

The middle of September roars in like a lion with 90 degree heat here in the bluegrass. It hasn't really rained in.....well, since the remnants of Katrina deposited a couple of inches of precipitation, locally. Yet, my grass continues to grow. It is especially dewy in the mornings and I figure it must be enough moisture to generate growth in the front yard. I have enough gas in my gas can for one more lawn mowing. Do I: A) Suck it up and mow it today and mow again next week? B) Wait until this weekend and mow so, hopefully, I won't have to mow anymore this year? or C) Don't mow it again until next spring? More than likely, A) will be the reality of my decision. I hate seeing an unkempt yard.

My brother Joel was excused from the academy a day early last week. He stopped by on Thursday night on his way back to Richmond. Joel sat his chompers down on probably the best bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich he ever ate. I have perfected this sandwich. The key (so no one should ever miss out) is to oven toast the bread with butter. Yep, that's it. This makes a great sandwich an O-some sandwich.

Joel came back down on Saturday to coincide with my cousin Jess's visit. The visit wasn't all pleasure, however. J and J had to go get fitted for their tuxes for my wedding. After the tux fitting, we went over to Kroger to get some grub to throw on the barbie. We decided on burgers with some onions and mushrooms. Yep, it was all fie fie delishe. Jess threw some of his Dale's burgers together, while Joel talked on the phone. Thanks, Joel. Joel's roomate, A-Ron, came over to eat some grub and make the fourth in some Cornish Hole action (don't ask-see comments from "2005 Abner Family Reunion and a Cat No One Could Find" blog). We threw our arms off and kept score fairly, thanks to the future in-laws' birthday gift(cornhole scoreboard and beer holders).

Jess began to wax philosophical poetic to the audience. Joel chucked one in the hole on the first throw.
Jess: "Ooo, Jon. Joel's calling. Are you gonna answer?"
Jon: "What?"
Jess: "He's got one in."
Jon: --cornhole--
Jess: "Ooo, Joel! Jon answered!"
Joel: "That's okay. I'll put him on hold."

Then, Joel proceeded to accumulate a mound of bags on the board, whilst I deposited none. I think he disconnected my phone. The phone related comments went from there everytime someone would score on the first toss. Soon, we were saying we were texting each other, setting up conference calls, crank calling, etc., everytime someone would score first. A very silly conversation, I know.

Wasn't it great to watch some football this weekend? UK won. They beat a poor Idaho State (Div. I AA), barely. When I say "poor", I don't mean I feel sorry for them "poor". I mean they were broke-ass. This Idaho State team plays three universities from Montana in the Big Sky conference. I didn't know the state of Montana had three universities. I have changed my mind about UK football. So, UK football is ragged, what's new?

Pigg and I went over to this new Irish Pub off of Harrodsburg Road in the Palomar Center called Beef 'O' Brady's to watch the Pittsburgh game. It was pretty cool. They had good wings and great onion rings to go along with the games and they had ALL the games. I counted 14 TVs and 2 projection widescreens. There were around a hundred people there and one Chicago Bears fan(not sure if you can classify them as a person). And wouldn't you know, he was the loudest cuss there. I don't know if you watched the Bears/Redskins game, but the final score was 9-7, Redskins. From just listening to the guy, you would have thought the Bears were beating them 40-0. I finally figured out that he was going bonkers over every first down or big tackle. The same kind of bonkers I go when I hit a $200 trifecta at Keeneland. Obscene.

My company picnic is this Saturday. It's four hours long, but they will be giving away twenty $50 gas cards and gift cards every hour, on the hour. With today's gas prices, you can't afford to miss that. Plus, there will be free burgers and hot dogs with all the free ice cream you can eat!

Miller High Life Light is 5.69 a twelve pack. You had better stock up. Peace in the southeast!

Now, Check Out Ya Boy!!!

My brother in his free time. Seriously, how could you? Why would you? Cuz, its funny. That's why.

http://www.jowlers.com/browse/497/

Check Out Ya Boy

Your boy, Jo El Son Yea, has made the internet. Check these links out to see him in action...or stand at attention. http://www.kentuckystatepolice.org/images/cadet_class_84/week_7/26.jpg
http://www.kentuckystatepolice.org/images/cadet_class_84/week_3/DSC_0044.jpg
http://www.kentuckystatepolice.org/images/cadet_class_84/week_3/smith4.jpg
http://www.kentuckystatepolice.org/images/cadet_class_84/week_1/D_C2.jpg

Hint: On the last picture, Joel is on the left edge of the picture with his back to the camera.

Labor Day News

That weekend did not last long enough. I know you guys can sympathize, especially those who ended up traveling most of the weekend. It seems as if all of my three and four day weekends always end up in excursions to my parents, Beth's parents, or elsewhere. I love visiting people, but I am waiting for the day when I can say, "Beam me up, Scotty!"

Beth and I journeyed to Breathitt County this weekend to see my parents. And of course, hit up the Honey Festival (the annual county festival to celebrate the local honey production or the lack thereof). I mainly use the Honey Festival as a means to partake in carnie (spelled right?) food. You know the sort...funnel cakes, blooming onions, corndogs, etc. And speaking of the corndogs, this was the selling point of the festival for Beth. I had ranted to her about the deliciousness of the festival favorite. And, yes, she loves corndogs in general.

Once at the festival, we rendezvoused with my Uncle David, Aunt Carol, and cousin David Kyle to watch the parade. My cousin and daughter of the aforementioned elders, Courtney, was in the parade. The parade itself was not disappointing, but being used as target practice for munchkins with taffy and lollipop shaped projectiles was. Ten feet away, these kids are reaching back like Derek Jeter to throw out somebody at first base. Beth was busted in the noggin by her favorite candy, a melted Reese's peanut butter egg. How ironic?

After the parade was over, it was corndog thirty. Universal corndog eating time. Everyone descended on the 4-H booth to collect their bounty. Fortunately, I was near the front of the line. After receiving four piping hot corndogs for us to share, the culmination of the long hot morning was nearing its acme. CRUNCH! What? These corndogs aren't what used to be. They were not as sweet, nor as crunchy as the bars of gold I once consumed as a youngster. Crap!
Well, honestly, they weren't that bad, but they weren't what they used to be either. I can't honestly say I have ever eaten a bad corndog. Just letting those who missed out know, you didn't really miss out. Just go buy some State Fair brand hotdogs and bake the crap out of them.

Saturday night back in Lexington, we ate dinner at El Chico over in the Beaumont Center off of Harrodsburg Road. This is a pretty tasty Mexican joint. It also has some C-list patrons. I saw Kenny "Sky" Walker at the bar. The bartender was some young guy from Louisville who was getting on the "Sky's" nerves. So bad, in fact, he got up from the bar and sat down with two random Joes sitting across from the bar. Funny.

I watched the UK/UofL game Sunday with my brother in law-from Louisville. It wasn't too painful, as he isn't much of a trash talker,"Thanks David!" UK, however, did not let me down this weekend. But, you say, "J-Deezy, they got beat!" I say, "Only by naked eye of those who watched the game and saw the score." Ha! Ha! They really did impress me, though. I just hope the Cats keep up the intensity of their second half through the SEC play. They can be a good team. They just need to can Mike Archer, the defensive-nimwit-coordinator. The offense looked pretty good, thanks to Joker Phillips.

After the game, we joined some friends and old acquaintances who went to the game. For the most part, I would say they had too good of a time, if you know what I'm saying. Not an intelligent conversation to be found. Shoot, one guy even told me that Miller High Life Light was crappy beer. I responded thusly, "Yes, little man, it is, but I like it and I won't make you drink it. Nor will I ask if you would like one!" Ha! Take that Little Dan.

Enough of this nonsense for now. Football is underway. Go get fitted for your tux if you haven't already. Wedding train is rolling! Go on, now!

Happy Birthday!

Let's all join in and give my brother Chase a deafening "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!" Maybe, he'll hear it in Carbondale, ILL. I wish you the happiest birthday, brother, and I hope you and Alisha have the best Labor Day weekend possible! HIZZAH!